I'm sure the philosphical mood is contributed in part to the fact that I've spent most of the day listening to an audiobook of Dan Brown's The Da Vinci Code. For those of you who've read it, I'm sure you'll know what I'm talking about when it came to Phi and the significance it plays. It seems remarkable, almost criminal that you never run across that in your education. That this number holds so much significance as to seem almost to be a key to creation is just mind boggling. No wonder the ancient philosophers thought that they had found a divine number. It makes you wonder if at the core of all the chaos of our lives there is a shimmering band of order, harder than steel and acting as the foundation of all we know and are. They say that in the end, the only true there is in this world is of mathematics. The only beauty the one of swirling numbers. It's a pity then that I never cared much for math since I think I could really use some fundamental enlightening truth right about now.
I've spent some time recently thinking about faith. It's no surprise to those of you who've heard me speak of the subject in even the most cursory fashion that I've always envied those with faith. It must be a great comfort to KNOW, deep in your being, what the point of it all is. Many of us, the more cynical, sometimes see faith as a weakness, or as a crutch. The more asinine suggest that only the dim or the weak cling to it. There's a strength in faith however that comes of surrendering yourself to an idea that is larger to yourself, one that by definition, has no proof in what you can see, or touch, or hear. Maybe faith is a crutch for those who choose to follow instead of think, but for some, I can think of not much that requires as much courage.
I wonder if we do have multiple lives to tread, if there's any truth to the idea of living past lives. Given the chance to do it all again, I still remember reading in a book by a woman who claimed to have had a near death experience that in what she saw, we all choose to be born here and now. We select who we become and many make the journey repeatedly. The lives we choose to live, choices made so that we could learn, and experience, and grow. To be put together only when we die and return again to whatever existance there is past physical life. Surely each of us has learned things in our lives that would not have been possible if we were not who we are. That sounds pretty facile, but true nonetheless. Can you really explain your existance to someone who lives in a mud hut in the middle of some jungle somewhere, and could they ever hope to have you understand theirs? To really learn, you have to be and I guess it would be soothing to believe that there is some purpose that at least extends that far.