4) What are some of Hello Kitty's sexual powers?
It's hard to separate myth and legend from reality here, since
many who've had sex with Hello Kitty are either unconscious or
babble incoherently in altered states of consciousness for days
afterwards. None the less, Hello Kitty's sexual powers are
clearly awesome, her gymnastic genital control being exceeded only by
her mastery of female ejaculation. Hello Kitty is able to propel herself
high into the air from her own ooze/squirt. She will sometimes, for
example, have half a dozen male partners lie on their backs, and Hello
Kitty will propel herself from throbbing erect penis to throbbing erect
penis without using her arms or legs, and is able to do so with such
rapidity that each partner feels like they alone are screwing Hello
Kitty. Hello Kitty's labia taste sweeter than honey, juicier than
oranges, more intoxicating than absinthe, and more addictive than
chocolate. Her lovers often bottle up her vaginal secretions, and
although they are not scarce such bottles still sell for high prices.
Some claim that Hello Kitty Pussy Juice not only cures impotence and
reverses the ageing process, but can even cure disease and raise the dead.
Tiny amounts of smegma from around Hello Kitty's clitoris are used as a
flavoring agent in all Hello Kitty Bubble Gum (especially the
I dunno about you but I don't think I'll be chewing gum for a while.