January 19th, 2007

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When idiots kill

Nanny details pact and betrayals that followed an alleged murder conspiracy

DAYTONA BEACH, Fla. — A pinkie swear was not enough to preserve the complicated relationship between a woman and her nanny once they had both been arrested for murder.

In the days before Karen Tobie and Lynne Blake were taken into custody for the murder of Tobie's husband, John Cataneo, Tobie consulted a lawyer while Blake considered confessing to police.

"I thought she was trying to push this all off on me," Blake testified Wednesday.

On Oct. 6, 2004, several months after the murder, the two women wrapped pinkies and swore to keep their mouths shut, according to Blake.

The next day, police put a secret recording device in Lynne Blake's bra.

"Don't chicken out. We don't say anything," Tobie told her friend and child's nanny in a recording played for jurors. "Do not fall into this s---, Lynne, because this will be our downfall."

Cataneo was shot four times outside his duplex apartment on the night of June 30, 2004. Tobie and the alleged gunman, Tysjohaun Cooper, are now on trial for his murder and face the death penalty if convicted.

It's a sad, sad day when you can't count on a solemn pinky-swear to keep someone quiet about a murder. Whatever happened to those lost days of integrity when hooking little digits with another peson actually meant something? Maybe they should have also used the finger zipper across the mouth, locking and throwing away the key as a backup.
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Chinks win the race war

Since I'm not a Survivor watcher, I'm around a month behind on the news that the latest escapade has reached its conclusion. Survivor: Cook Islands, which raised such a hoopla because it featured racial teams battling against one another, has crowned its winner Yul Kwon. In case you couldn't tell from the name, the asians smoked the honkeys, negros, and wetbacks. That's right, people. Bow down to the master race. It's lucky that the final challenge wasn't something that involved driving.

I hear that England's Celebrith Big Brother show is having its own racial contraversy of late. Since the only reality show I watch nowadays is Top Chef, the only reason I even know about this is because it's splattered all over the news for some unknown reason. I guess our own stupidass reliaty shows aren't creating enough strife that we have to go gawk at foreign ones now. I have no real clue what the content of the supposed racism is, but I'm going to go out on a limb and say that it's only racism if it isn't funny. If it's funny, it's kosher. Since this is a house full of limeys, it's almost certainly not funny.