May 6th, 2008

discworld grim squeaker

Leonardoodle is the leader of the group, transformed from the norm by the mutagen goop

The above was just one of the entries at last year's Super Groom contest in Las Vegas, a competition to transform your dog into something worthy of ridicule. I just don't understand how something like this didn't win. It wasn't even the runner up according to news accounts of the event.

Myra Macia, of Texas, took first place by turning her standard poodle, Peach Cobbler, into a Poodle Rider motorcycle. Katherine Ray was second with her depiction of a horse sculpted into her poodle's fur. They beat Carmon Baker's dog Missy, who looked like mutt-on dressed as lamb with fishnet stockings, high-heeled pixie boots and a powder pink top.

Man, now I want a Leonardoodle. It'd be worth it just to walk it down the street and see people's reactions.
discworld cohen candy

Lose 2d6 testosterone points

Connie is once again passing me more girly stuff to sell on eBay. I never even finished getting rid of all of those Vera Bradley bags from last time. There are still a couple left that no one ended up buying. This time around I'm hawking something called 'Petunia Pickle Bottom'. When I first heard the name I thought for sure it must have something to do with the Rugrats. Instead, it turns out to be another one of those status symbol items that cost and arm and a leg and no normal person should be willing to pay for. Most of these bags are hideously ugly in my opinion, but the fact that they're status symbols seem to blind people. Take a look for yourself if you don't believe me. Most of them look like something an old woman would upholster her couch with.

I just don't get women and their endless array of purses and crap. I can only imagine that it's one of those Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus scenarios. How can you even be sure that others will recognize what you're carrying as being something of value rather than what a blind person picked out from good will? Are women trained to recognize the difference at a distance and then appropriately ooze envy or something?

This whole thing reminds me of a conversation I had ages ago about shoes. Most women I've known have dozens of pairs of the dratted things and the explaination is always that only certain shoes can go with certain outfits and so on. I've not sure I've ever intentionally looked at someone's feet to check out their footgear in my entire life. It would take a massive amount of disconnect, like wearing army boots with a prom dress, for me to take note of it. I'd like to believe that most men are the same way so the only reason to do all this is to impress other women. Why the heck would you even want to bother? Well, unless you're a lesbian or something. There just doesn't seem to be much point to it.

Oh well. I guess the upshot is that I don't really have to understand it. I just have to hope that women remain insane enough to buy this crap until I can clear my inventory. One of them already sold last night.