August 3rd, 2008

no hippies

Tastes like patchouli

Apparently things are even more disturbed in the case of the canadian beheading extraveganza than I thought. Take a gander at the news report out today:

TORONTO, Ontario (AP) -- A police officer at the scene of a grisly beheading on a Canadian bus reported seeing the attacker hacking off pieces of the victim's body and eating them, according to a police tape leaked on the Internet Saturday.

In the tape of radio transmissions, a Royal Canadian Mounted Police officer refers to the attacker as "Badger" and says he is armed with a knife and scissors and is "defiling the body at the front of the bus as we speak."

On the tape, which lasts about 80 seconds, officers continue to detail the attacker's movements until one reports, "Badger's at the back of the bus, hacking off pieces and eating it."

Vince Weiguang Li, 40, faces second-degree murder charges for the slaying of a 22-year-old man, whom friends and family identified as Tim McLean. Police have not confirmed the victim's identity.

Holy dog shit, batman. Things must be even worse up in the great wide north than here as far as the economy goes. Hell, at least we're not starting to eat one another yet. Well, unless you mean in the figurative sense and that takes place in just about any ghetto in the country.

Maybe it's time to schedule a couple of airlift food drops so those crazy Canadian whackjobs don't have to resort to cannibalism. You can almost see the reasoning behind the nut's action though. I mean, the victim's name was McLean. Wasn't that some sort of burger put out by McDonalds a few years ago? In this health conscious age where everyone is watching their cholesterol level, who wouldn't be worried about fat content?

I have to say, I'm also a bit confuzzled about the police naming the guy 'Badger'. I'm not quite sure we're talking about the same animal here. It's that small little beaver-like critter that looks like a fat ferret, right? I mean, if I saw some psychopath stab the fuck out of someone, sever his head, and then go to town like it were an all-you-can-eat buffet, I'm not sure if 'Badger' would be the first synonymous animal to come to mind. All I can think is that either the first cop on the scene was a fatuous moron or there's some species of crazed canadian badger heretofore unknown to those of us south of the border.

This news story has.....

Made me even more contemptuous of crazy canadians
me cowering in fear over mutant canadian badgers
taught me that you only ride the bus if you're tired of living
me wondering whatever happened to the McLean and whether it'll be brought back