January 21st, 2010

cartoon hat made of guts

Shake, rattle, and asshole

Remember back not so long ago when Obama was shaking Hugo Chavez's hand and talking about how we should improve relations? I guess the honeymoon is over. Here's a fun little snippet in the news today:

The leader of Venezuela Hugo Chavez is blaming the United States for Haiti's earthquake claiming that the U.S. tested a “tectonic weapon” causing the devastation.

According to Chavez the earthquake was a result of “weapon earthquakes” started by the U.S. that would eventually be used to take over Iran.

In case you want to see one news video about this story:

What I really don't get is if we did have this weapon, why in the world would we test it on freaking Haiti? Why not just travel south a ways and shove it up Chavez's fat ass. Then again, seeing as the dems are in charge nowadays, maybe that's just a pipe dream. There are plenty of progressives who still think Venezuela is a socialist paradise worth emulating.

It's still hard to believe sometimes. No matter how much I know Hugo Chavez is a massive assclown, it never fails that at least a few times a year I see a clip of him saying something so ridiculous that I'm amazed he's the president of a country. I understand he's a quasi-dictator, but you'd think he'd be a laughingstock in the country after putting out something this patently ridiculous.

Sometimes, I almost wish that the delusions of conspiracy theorists were actually true. Wouldn't it be nice to believe the US did have these superweapons or that our government was actually intelligent and competent enough to come up with huge conspiracies which shake the world's foundation? Hell, next I'll be wishing there actually were a cabal of super-Jews who secretly rule the world from Geneva.