In the darkness the trees are full of starlight (henwy) wrote,
In the darkness the trees are full of starlight

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If only this worked for me too. I have a flail all ready.

I normally pay no attention at all to sports except when something incredibly atrotious or incredibly entertaining happens. More times than not, these two qualifiers tend to skip hand-in-hand down the merry path of my consciousness. What people seem to be buzzing about lately is some neanderthal took his hockey stick and whacked some other neanderthal upside the head with it. This has lead to the standard bemoaning about what our society has come to and most people's general indifference because hockey sucks ass and the only entertaining part is watching someone get a beat down.

The NHL has suspended neanderthal #1 for 25 games, which is apparently the longest punishment passed down thus far. No big deal, right? What apalled me is that reading the article I find this disturbing sentence.

Based on Simon's $1 million contract, he will lose at least $80,200 because of the suspension.

WTF?! For those who aren't aware of it (and I certainly wasn't until google) the NHL hockey season is 82 games long. This dingus has just been suspended at the very least for the last 15 games of the regular season and will only take a 80k hit to his salary?

15/82 = 18.3% of the games in a season

80,200/1,000,000 = 8.0% of the contract

Who the fuck writes these freaking contracts? How in the world could you have someone who misses 18% of his contractual obligations and only ends up taking a 8% hit to salary? This is only if we count the regular season too. Add post-season in there and the nutjob could miss all 25 games. No wonder atheletes aren't worried about being suspended. Fuck, it's like a vacation of sorts. When you no longer feel like working, just club someone in the back of the head with your stick and wham, instant time off. In fact, maybe that's something this guy has already learned. It's not exactly his first run-in with suspension time.

Simon has been suspended four other times for violent on-ice acts, and received a three-game ban in 1997 after directing a racial slur toward player Mike Grier, who is black.
Tags: hockey, news

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