In the darkness the trees are full of starlight (henwy) wrote,
In the darkness the trees are full of starlight

  • Mood:

Operation: Dopehead

So far, it looks like aggressive narcotic use has been a net positive. I'm no longer trying to just consume the meds whenever there is an accute problem and simply pop one ever few hours to keep it generally at bay. Because of that, I'm experiencing a general uptick in wellbeing, though it dosen't mean there aren't still periods of extreme unpleasantness. The real problem, of course, is that I'm functioning pretty well but it's in a freeform environment without any demands. Put me into a situation where I don't have that complete freedom and I think things would go south in a hurry.

I'll actually get a chance to test that grim little hypothesis this weekend. Spring Gathering starts this friday and I figured I would at least try to attend and see how it goes. I've avoided almost all events for ages now because of my worries that whatever positives I would get out of attending would be overshadowed by the pain and problems involved. After all, it's been a chore to just maintain smooth functioning at home where I can basically do whatever I need to whenever I need to. Change a dressing, have a lie down, pop pills, etc. I also don't have to 'act normal' at home which means I can limp and gimp as much as I need to, which is also a relief.

Oh well. Nothing to do but see how it pans out. It might give me an idea of how origins will work out. After all, if things don't go well for a con that's 15 minutes away from home, it might not bode well for one where the distance is hundreds of miles.
Tags: chronic pain, double exposure, origins

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