SWANVILLE (Oct 23): Maine State Police are attempting to locate a 22-year-old Swanville man who fled into the woods near the Stevens Road on Monday afternoon after allegedly choking his sister.
Trooper Luke Cunningham said Nicholas Palmer, who is believed to have a cut hand from the skirmish, is wanted for questioning.
Four troopers and two K-9s searched the area from about 1 p.m. to 5:30 p.m. Monday, but did not locate Palmer.
Cunningham said he was dispatched to the home when Palmer's 18-year-old sister called 911 to report that her brother was choking her. The siblings allegedly had fought about whether their cat, which had fleas, should be shaved.
According to Cunningham, Palmer was reportedly trying to cut the cord of an electric razor that his sister was using to shave the cat when she kicked him, and he sliced his hand with the knife he was holding.
Cunningham said Palmer allegedly then began to choke his sister, at which time she called police. Palmer reportedly broke his sister's cell phone and then ran into the woods.
I'm guessing this might be a good example of cats exerting demonic mind control abilities over their human slaves. No doubt the Hellbeast (codename: Mittens or some such) took control of the sappy brother in an attempt to avoid being shaved. It's a well-known fact that shaved cats are hilarious looking and we rob them of a little of their power whenever they become the object of ridicule.
See what I mean?