In the darkness the trees are full of starlight (henwy) wrote,
In the darkness the trees are full of starlight

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Satanic Cat Watch: Day 1553

I was flipping through the videos on CNN a couple days ago when I saw an interesting story about a house fire and cat rescue. I knew right from the start that if a cat was involved, there would surely be a media conspiracy to not disclose the fact that the cat was responsible and trying to roast its human slaves alive. Needless to say, I wasn't disapointed. Instead, the news story attempted to feed the public some tripe about a fireman recessitating a cat with mouth to mouth. Hogwash. Here's a picture:

As you can see above, what's really happening is he's trying to recover his soul that the cat sucked from his body when he first entered the burning building. I figure the series of events went something like this.

  • Demon cat proceeds to move around the darkened home sitting on the chests of its human occupants and eating their souls.

  • Fire is set in order to destroy evidence of the grissly murder scene.

  • Cat lounges about in somnolent doze after gorging on the souls of the innocent.

  • EMS and rescue workers arrive, breaking into the building lookig for human survivors.

  • Brutal soul-sucking battle then occurs

Now, I could be wrong here. I guess it's also possible he was trying to consume the cat head-first annaconda-style or that this is in-fact the start of some cross-species porn flick. For a mixture of the two, they could always market the film under the title of 'Eat the pussy'.
Tags: news, satanic cat watch

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