In the darkness the trees are full of starlight (henwy) wrote,
In the darkness the trees are full of starlight
henwy

  • Mood:

Operation: Happy

I'll admit that I wasn't expecting the final result to be 'Happy' on the poll. I had already been thinking about bitter rants or nonsensical gibbering in preparation. God knows either of those would be easier than happy but happy is what people voted for and happy is what I will try to provide. I had also decided early on that no matter the result, I would try to make the entry be personal rather than simply providing commentary on some news event or info that sparked a response. That, of course, is going to make this exceedingly difficult.

Happy. Happy in my life. Happy. Hmmm. I guess the only really happy thing in my life is family. It's easy to overlook it but I'm incredibly lucky that I have a family that loves me, supports me, and is helping me out. This is ecspecially true in my situation where due to medical issues, things are not all that pleasant. It's hard enough to survive completely on your own without people to lean on in some manner and it can only be worse when you're less than fully functional. I sometimes think about those who might also suffer what I do but lack the support that I have and, if it's not a happy thought, at least it's a very grateful one. This is ecspecially true because I've never felt comfortable leaning on friends for support. It's not like I don't know that they wouldn't be there if I needed the help, but I've always kept myself at a little bit of a distance. With friends I've known for all my life, I still ask little and try my best not to impose. It's just a personality quirk that's been with me from the start. You never try to lean on friends or acquaintances because they have their own lives, their own problems, and even if they deny it, it still feels like an imposition. Family is there whether you ask or not. Family cares no matter what. Without family....well, this is supposed to be a happy entry so we won't even go there. Sometimes the Hand of God comes down and flicks you in the head with the middle finger of doom and there's nothing you can do about it. It's just bad luck, or fate, or whatever. Knowing that you have people who love you and help you is the best you can hope for. (Well, other than wishing the damn finger would have flicked some other wanker)
Tags: reader's choice
Subscribe

  • Cheer up, the worst is yet to come

    Being alone with fear can rapidly turn into panic. Being alone with frustration can rapidly turn into anger. Being alone with disappointment can…

  • Hello darkness, my old friend

    Part of every misery is, so to speak, the misery's shadow or reflection: the fact that you don't merely suffer but have to keep on thinking…

  • Worst birthday party EVER

    So yes, it's true that I wasn't really looking forward to Maddie's birthday party. In fact, I was far more entranced with the idea of gorging on…

  • Post a new comment

    Error

    Anonymous comments are disabled in this journal

    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

  • 2 comments