JONES, Okla. -- A squirrel caught fire, sparking a blaze Wednesday morning that resulted in the evacuation of an elementary school in Jones, fire officials said.
Investigators said the squirrel touched two power lines at the same time and fell to the ground near Britton and Hiawassee roads.
That fire burned 5 acres in the Jones area, forcing the evacuation of the elementary school. Those students were taken to Jones High School.
I can't help but think there could be a weapon system somewhere in this. I figure we can coat any future squirrels with some flame retardant gel and then with napalm. We light them all on fire and then fire them out of a canon into enemy territory. There would have to be some system that lets them land safely and then they could run around in a frenzy setting the local brush on fire. The resulting smoke would provide cover for the movement of infantry in the area.
Now, this obviously wouldn't work in an urban area. Well, not until our scientists discover a way for squirrels to set fire to concrete. Still, it could be very useful in the brush or woodland areas.