In the darkness the trees are full of starlight (henwy) wrote,
In the darkness the trees are full of starlight

  • Mood:

Existential dread: 90%

I've been feeling pretty awful lately. It's really no surprise that my life in general has been backsliding for a number of years. Ever since disability became a necessity, I more or less gave up, though it's been a steady decline rather than a rapid one. At first I still had something close to a life but bit by bit it's all rotted and blown away. For the most part, I've managed to avoid any self-reflection. I've kept myself busy with trivialities. I've read, I've listened to audiobooks, I've spent innumerable hours playing ridiculous facebook games and I've invested my time and energy in all those so I didn't have to look at the emptiness. What it comes down to in the end is that when looking in the mirror I see a wasted life. What is that quote that slips my mind at the moment? Something like great potential to no great purpose? Everything tastes like ashes.
Tags: depression

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