In the darkness the trees are full of starlight (henwy) wrote,
In the darkness the trees are full of starlight

  • Mood:

It's all a little crushing

If I had to describe how I've been feeling lately it's as if someone turned up the gravity or there's an invisible weight bearing down on me. I assume it's just the physical manifestation of emotional angst, but I was just thinking that wouldn't it be funny if it was actually something physical after all. I know I'd find it pretty hilarious if this heartsick feeling I've had for weeks now were actually some physical malady. It's not like there aren't some candidates for to fill out such a theory. After all, I'm taking new medication in the form of the Humira and I never did go and have that blood test to make sure it wasn't screwing with me somehow. That and the discontinuation of the vast majority of the opiates I used to be taking could also be throwing me into a tailspin. Maybe all of this is just an illusion and I'm just misinterpreting all the symptoms. I'm not really depressed, lost, and despairing. I just think I am because of the symptomology and when that goes away, I'll poof back from the edge.

Then again....

maybe not.

It's hard not to think....

if I were a braver man.
Tags: depression, drugs, humira

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