In the darkness the trees are full of starlight (henwy) wrote,
In the darkness the trees are full of starlight

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The neverending story

I've been in a malaise lately, ever since getting back from Vegas. Barring a few events, I've mostly spent my time doing my giant sloth imitation and the days have sort of melded together into a gray oneness. I know I should try to make more of an effort, or hell, any effort in keeping up with the LJ but it's just hard to scrape up the motivation. I think part of the problem is the same thing that keeps me from playing video games anymore. I've always had a completionist bent, meaning that I would often spend ridiculous amounts of time grinding away until I finished every last optional quest or picked up the super doodad, which could only be obtained by going through hell. It would actually drive me crazy when I discovered I had missed something and I was known to load up old save files, blowing away hours of effort just to scoop up the missing thing-a-ma-bob.

As you can imagine, this got pretty tiring after a while. Not to mention tedious as all hell. It got so that I would buy games, even read the faqs in preparation, and then never actually get around to playing it or stopping just a hour or two in. Not playing at all seemed to be better than playing and screwing up somewhere. To some degree that's how LJ feels to me. Not that there's a right way or a wrong way to write an entry, but as the things I should be posting pile up it becomes easier to just do nothing at all. I've got ridiculous numbers of Vegas pictures and it would take a lot of time to upload, resize, upload to a hosting site, and then caption the lot of it. While a half-assed effort is better than no effort, tell that to my cerebral cortex.

Lets's a list of the things I've meant to post up to around half a year ago and never got around to (and these are just the things I still remember):

Gencon recap
Trip to Charliecon
Steve and Christina's pig roast
Various blog whozits including a revised pain scale I love
Tons of anime reviews (Arakawa under the bridge, K-on, Ano Hi Mita Hana no Namae o Boku-tachi wa Mada Shiranai, Ben-to, Dragon Crisis, Hen Zemi, Lyrical Nanoha, Nanoha StrikerS, Nanoha A's, and craptons more I can't even remember off the top of my head)
Midieval Times
The Bills' Holiday Party
Maddie's Birthday Party

And God only knows what else. It's funny really, I sometimes think that what I really need to blog effectively is a mind reader. I find myself often thinking what I should post to LJ (and then never do) and often ramble off the entry in my head as a monologue. If there were some way to just suck that out of my head and spit it out in bits and bytes, it would solve everything.
Tags: anime/manga, lj-related, malaise, procrastination

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